Primal Birth…..If you are at all involved in the Natural Birth Community, you may hear lots of terms thrown around…” unassisted birth”, “assisted birth”, “Natural birth”, “wild pregnancy”, “physiological birth” etc.
I use the term “Primal Birth” on Wild Mother because I feel like it best describes the kind of birth experience that I want to promote.
So let’s break a few things down – what is Primal Birth?
What is Primal Birth
1. Giving Birth where you feel most comfortable
I am a huge advocate for women giving birth at home with a midwife.
For most women, home is the place where they feel safe, calm, and comfortable. Being able to stay calm and comfortable helps your body to be able to deliver your baby efficiently and safely. When you start feeling stressed or worried, it puts your body into a state of stress and Fight or Flight mode, and many times contractions can slow down or even stop altogether.
That being said, I do think there are occasions where women will feel most comfortable giving birth in a hospital, and it would actually be more stressful to have their baby at home.
This could be due to underlying conditions or situations where hospital care may be required.
This was the case with my first baby. I was born with an intestinal birth defect – gastroschisis – and the effects of it later in life have not been well studied. There are many personal accounts of women who are unable to get pregnant at all, unable to maintain a pregnancy, or unable to push a baby out due to the surgery that happened when they were born because of this birth defect.
So in my situation because of my birth defect, I felt most comfortable delivering in a hospital for my first child. My husband and I did not take this decision lightly, and we were very educated and specific about our provider, our birth plan, and laboring at home as long as possible.
We had a beautiful, hands off birth in a hospital, but we truly did have to be educated and ready to fight for it.
Birth has become very medicalized and many of the standard procedures done in hospitals are not evidence-based. I think it’s really important to be aware of this if you are planning to give birth in a hospital.
I do have other articles talking about ways to prepare if you are wanting to have a natural birth in a hospital. It can be done, but it is hard and it’s something you have to be willing to fight for (and who wants to fight while in labor?).
Primal birth to me, means giving birth where YOU, as the mother, are most comfortable. Not where anyone else tells you that you should be.
Many women choose a hospital because they are scared of something going wrong at home.
Other women who birth at home may choose to do so because they want to avoid unnecessary interventions at a hospital.
Many times, once mothers get educated about unmedicated birth and shift their mindset to begin viewing birth as a normal process instead of an emergency, they feel more comfortable birthing at home.
2. Only having the people there who will empower you
Relaxation is crucial to be able to labor calmly and quickly. When women have people at their birth with whom they are not comfortable, it delays labor and makes the woman feel stressed.
“Let me just check your dilation real quick.”
“What if you just lay down and we leave this monitor on you the whole time so you don’t have to walk back over when I need to check the baby’s heart rate every thirty minutes.”
“If you just let the doctor break your water, the baby will be here in no time.”
Those are all things that were said to me by my (well meaning) nurse at the hospital where I delivered my daughter.
My story has a happy ending. My story was not dramatic. Overall I had a good hospital experience. But how many women cannot share that sentiment? How many women are discouraged or disempowered or made to feel like an animal at the zoo? So many. I’ve heard it so many times. And it breaks my heart.
Having a primal birth means selectively choosing who you will allow in your birth space. Being strategic about surrounding yourself with a supportive birth team who believe in your body just as much as you do.
If you are giving birth in a hospital, a doula could be a great asset to your team. Doulas are trained to advocate for your birth preferences and choices, support you during labor, and help your partner know how to support you as well.
3. Educating yourself about birth and trusting your body to birth your baby
In the natural birth world, I’ve noticed that there tend to be two extremes.
There are women who hold the view that they trust their body so much, that they don’t even think they need to do any work around educating themselves about birth, techniques to manage labor, or how to avoid complications.
On the opposite end, there are women who are completely analytical and read every book, do multiple courses, etc. But they lack a trust in their body and a deep intuitive connection with their baby.
I think there can be a very healthy middle ground.
Since we no longer grow up in villages where we support and watch other women in our lives giving birth, nursing, and raising babies – we really lack education around the whole process.
Birth can feel scary or unknown.
The way TV shows depict birth is almost always as a crisis where the mother is helpless and disempowered and a (usually Male) OB rescues her and her baby from certain death. (insert eye roll)
For many of us in our modern age, our own labor and birth will be the first that we have witnessed first hand.
This is why I feel it is so important to educate ourselves on the birth process; To have a deep respect and knowledge of how your body works and techniques to manage labor.
- Watch videos online of other women having a peaceful birth so you can feel inspired that you can as well.
- Read books written by midwives who believe in this power women have of being Life Givers.
- Take a natural childbirth class with your partner so they can be educated as well.
Once you become educated, realize that you can trust – deeply trust – your body and your baby to work together to bring this new life earthside.
4. Listening to your instincts and intuition while pregnant and birthing your baby
RELATED: What is Intuitive Parenting?
A big part of my mission with Wild Mother is to encourage women to start listening to their intuition again. That gut feeling – that instinct – that every mother has (animal and human alike).
For most of us, our intuition was silenced from an early age and we were taught to ignore our gut feelings and not listen to our instincts.
But those feelings are so important for our survival.
So I want to challenge you – start questioning everything.
I think society is scared of Wild Mothers who start questioning the mainstream and begin listening to their intuition.
They want to keep us caged, scared, and meek. “Be a good girl”, they told us growing up. “Be a good patient”, they want to say now.
They don’t want us to realize that we can birth in power.
They don’t want us to realize that we have everything we need inside of us to birth our babies. They don’t want us to realize that for the vast majority of women (of course there are always exceptions), we don’t need to be in a hospital – in fact, I would argue that we shouldn’t be in a hospital.
They don’t want us to remember who we are.
They don’t want us to know that their interventions are actually what cause the majority of problems in hospital births today.
So let’s start questioning and asking ourselves what feels right.
Does it feel right for you to have a transvaginal ultrasound in the first trimester?
Does it feel right to receive a pap smear while pregnant?
Does it feel right for you to receive the Flu and Tdap shot while pregnant?
Does it feel right for you to drink a bottle of syrup filled with artificial dyes while pregnant?
Does it feel right to force your baby to come out before they’re ready for no reason except to keep with a doctor’s schedule?
Does it feel right to put antibiotic ointment in your newborn’s eyes as soon as they are born?
Does it feel right to give your newborn a Vaccine for a sexually transmitted disease (Hep B) as soon as they’re born?
Does it feel right to bathe your newborn or send them to a nursery or give them a pacifier?
Does it feel right to circumcise your newborn’s genitals? Is it needed?
If it doesn’t feel right, then question it. Research it. Educate yourself. Listen to counsel on all sides. But please, don’t ignore that nagging voice anymore.
Remember the women who gave birth before you.
Remember that birth is in your DNA.
Your body was literally made to be able to birth a baby.
And you know what’s best for that baby.
Wake up, Wild Mother.
5. Nourishing yourself with nutritionally dense foods and herbs during pregnancy and postpartum
RELATED: My Story: From Vegan to a Nourishing Ancestral Diet
If Primal birth means being conscious about choices you make around how to birth your baby, and following your instinct and intuition, then a very important factor in this is nutrition and making the best choices for nourishment while you’re growing a baby and for the first few weeks postpartum.
Did you know in traditional cultures, couples who were planning to have a baby would be put on a specific diet filled with nutrient rich foods for up to six months before conception? Even without science and knowing about nutrients and constituents, our ancestors realized that the elements in certain foods would provide nourishment and build a healthy baby.
This is important for the postpartum phase as well.
Many traditional cultures took it for granted that mothers would spend the first months after birth resting and bonding with their baby, establishing a breastfeeding relationship, and replenishing their bodies with nourishing and healing foods/herbs.
There are lots of different opinions on what types of foods women should be eating while pregnant, so use your intuition on the conflicting info. If avoiding dairy feels best – avoid dairy. If you love raw milk kefir or homemade mozzarella and that makes you feel your best – then eat it in moderation. Do your best to stick to WHOLE foods, avoiding processed foods and sugar as much as you can.
6. Keeping your baby close after birth
The last aspect of a primal birth is keeping your baby close to you after birth. This is very instinctual and we see it over and over in the animal kingdom.
Skin to skin contact and breastfeeding are crucial for your baby to begin early bonding with you.
Babywearing and sleeping close to each other further enhance and promote that connection.
Of course, family and friends will want to come see the baby, but you should always do what is most comfortable for you. Remember, other people are excited to meet the baby, but the baby really only needs you (and your partner after you).
For the past nine months, your baby was inside your body, warm and safe. Your voice, your smell, your warmth is all that your baby knows.
So question anyone who tries to tell you that you should put your baby in another room, or in a hospital nursery, or that they should be able to sleep away from you.
Never feel bad for keeping your baby close to you. NEVER.
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I think these components are really important for women to think about to begin taking back their births.
It’s your baby. It’s your body. It’s your birth.
Get quiet and listen to your intuition.
Research. Educate. Listen to the voices of those who are experienced in the kind of birth you want to have.
Remember the women who gave birth before you.
Remember the deep, primal parts of yourself that know how to roar a baby out.
So whatever you want to label your birth – “natural”, “physiological”, “primal”, “instinctual”, or “wild”, would you agree that it includes these components? Leave a comment and let me know!
